Just Cuz I Can :)

Here’s a link to my latest Buddha Neuron post. I’m pretty proud of what I’m doing on the other side lol. I’m also stressing about what I’m doing on the other side. It’s a huge learning curve for me and I’m working really hard to practice what I preach and NOT freak the fuck out…Oooommmm.

Pulled an all-nighter and need to go to sleep! This business start up stuff is STRESSFUL!!! Deadlines are brutal!!! I will be back when I’ve had some sleep lol. I will say however, that I am so damn proud of you, Tikeetha! And super envious and in awe!!! You seriously ROCK! You have to let me know how you manage to post something every friggin day! I am struggling with 2 X a week right now lol.

Then I remember. I just started. Literally.

And then I calm down.

Sigh 😉 ❤

I’m good.

Namaste xo

I Need My Space Back :)

So…after debating on this issue for the past week, on and off, I have decided that Coming Out Crooked needs to go back to it’s original format. My reasons are simple. I need my space back. This space was never meant for business consumption. It was meant to be a personal space for me to work out my shit. To capture the journey of my coming out and my life, with all the pain, the sadness, the joy and the love that has been in. I think it’s important that I keep this space for me.

This message is specifically for the followers that have joined ‘my tribe‘ in the past few weeks based on the positivity messages posted here in my JUST DO YOU newsletter. I have a new home for those messages, and for the newsletter, and it’s intention is clear. If you’d like to continue to follow me on that particular journey which is catered more to positive personal development and the power of self-talk, then please find me here!


It’s a brand new site. A new venture. A new journey. And it’s literally being built as I write this lol so it will be changing constantly until it’s all done! But the BLOG is up and running and new posts will appear on Tuesdays and Fridays. Right now, it’s where my true focus is so please feel free to join me. Everyone is invited lol. The Buddha Neuron is just as much a part of me as Coming Out Crooked. It just has a different focus. I’m a Gemini. Nuff said! Lol

That’s it!

Have an AWESOME weekend! And perhaps I will see you on the other side!



Women Should Have Sex With Other Women To Have More Orgasms…

Hey lol…this is STILL Coming Out Crooked! And I’m just doing me 😉

So, I was perusing my FB page and all the newsfeeds in it, and a friend of mine had this posted on her wall. The headline got my attention – Women Should Have Sex With Other Women To Have More Orgasms: According To Science…

Ya. That’s what I said. *grin*

Now, I have to preface this by saying that lately, I have been doing some research into what type of BLOG POST TITLES are the most catchy. The kind that will get folks like us to click on the caption and read on. There are all kinds of theories on this. It’s a freaking science now apparently and everybody has an opinion!

However, the general consensus seems to be that if the blog/newspaper/media caption has SEX or A TO DO LIST in it, like “10 WAYS TO GET YOUR PARTNER TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU ALL OVER AGAIN” or “5 WAYS TO GET YOUR LOVER TO PLEASE YOU IN BED” or “HOW TO KEEP IT UP AFTER 50”, then it’s pretty much a given that we will take action and click to read more. And yes, those were all real headlines. And yes, the list thing works on anything that’s not sexual lol. It’s just a thing, ya know? And it works!

And today, just NOW, I fell victim, once again, to the power of a well-phrased article title lol! Of course, if you don’t have an interest in the subject, no amount of catchiness is gonna get you to click.

I had an interest. Catchy won. I clicked. 😉

But, even as the page was loading, I had to laugh. A little. C’mon! I know I’ve been hearing this for some time now. Even before I came out! Still, maybe it’s news to some! But did we really need yet ANOTHER study – a HUGE NEW STUDY at that – to tell us this?

I’m always amazed at what constitutes as news these days!

But, hey, the theory behind catchy article title-ing seems correct! This particular title got my attention! Lol and I know it got yours, or you wouldn’t be reading this! Crazy huh? What a world lol 🙂

So, as a reward for your curious clicking here is the actual article.

I must admit, it was a little anti-climactic lol, and to be honest, I feel like it was a little misleading. But the Facebook newsfeed title of Women Should Have Sex With Other Women To Have More Orgasms: According To Science did the trick. It got me to read on! And that was the point. Wasn’t it?

And don’t get me started on imagery! Whole other blog post!

Latta lovelies ❤

Heterosexual women orgasm less than any other demographic when having sex, study says: There’s a huge gap between lesbian and straight women.


A huge new study has found that heterosexual women have fewer orgasms during sex than any other demographic, and it’s notably fewer than heterosexual men.

Researchers from Chapman University, Indiana University, and the Kinsey Institute studied over 52,000 Americans of different genders and sexual orientations to look into how orgasm frequency varies.

The study has drawn some interesting conclusions – perhaps unsurprisingly, heterosexual men were most likely to say they usually or always orgasm when they’re sexually intimate, with 95 per cent agreeing.

The next group most likely to orgasm were gay men (89 per cent) followed by bisexual men (88 per cent).

Disappointingly for women of all sexual orientations, all three male demographics came above the female groups.

Amongst women, lesbians orgasm most when sexually intimate, with 86 per cent reporting that they usually or always do.

This is followed by bisexual women – a huge drop down at 66 per cent – and finally straight women at 65 percent. It seems when a man is added into the mix, the likelihood of orgasm significantly decreases for women.The researchers believe that these “orgasm gaps” have come about as a result of sociocultural and evolutionary factors.

But they also found out what women who orgasm more frequently than others tend to do to get there, so if you want to increase your likelihood of having an O moment, this is what they recommend:

  • More oral sex
  • Longer lasting sex
  • Higher relationship satisfaction
  • Asking for what you want in bed
  • Praising your partner for what they do in bed
  • Calling or emailing “to tease about doing something sexual” – presumably a text or Snapchat works too
  • Wearing sexy lingerie
  • Trying new sexual positions
  • Anal stimulation
  • Acting out fantasies
  • Incorporating “sexy talk”
  • Expressing love during sex

According to the study authors: “Women were more likely to orgasm if their last sexual encounter included deep kissing, manual genital stimulation, and/or oral sex in addition to vaginal intercourse.”

The researchers also looked into why there was such a large difference between the frequency of orgasms for lesbian and straight women, concluding that lesbian women likely have a better understanding both of female anatomy and clitoral stimulation.

They also pointed out that lesbian women are better at taking turns in the bedroom than straight men.

But the high rate of orgasms of lesbian women should be encouraging for straight women.

“The fact that lesbian women orgasmed more often than heterosexual women indicates that many heterosexual women could experience higher rates of orgasms,” the authors write.

So it could be worth trying some of the above if you want to have more pleasure in the bedroom.

Hmmm…just sayin 😉

Happy HUMP day lol xo

Till next time,

Own Yourself!

Accept, Embrace & Love

Everything that makes you YOU!

Namaste your ASS off! ❤



I don’t understand the human condition anymore. Perhaps I never did. Why do we break each other so heartlessly? And do the things we do? Why do we hurt those we say we love? Make promises of fidelity. And forever. Then leave?

Why do we cherish their blank canvas then smear it with pain? Praise their strength then cut them down. Pray on their weakness then shame them for it. Calculate coldly for maximum effect? Leaving nothing behind but scattered fragments of a used to be. 

Why do we leave them bloody and broken? Wounded and wary. Afraid to love again. Forever changed in ways that predisposes repetition, regurgitation, and ruin. Unable to break the cycle…

I am



Trust atrophied

From lack of use

And I don’t understand


It was ever necessary

To break me.

Ashes: Pt 1

My mom died.

The relentless one.

The one I’ve lived a lifetime it seems, trying to please.

And failed.

Jennie Griffiths. RIP.

You were a tough love. But you were the only woman who felt like Mother.

Sad. Confused. Completely.

Been a bit of a struggle to get back here since the news. Lots of feelings swirling and fogging up the windshield. Working thru it…and Wow is all I’ve got.

Can’t see clearly right now.

But I’ll be back.

Millennial Child

Unrealistic worldview?

Socially conscious?

Acceptable grossly exaggerated sense of entitlement?

No ownership of chaos?

Linear all inclusive me, me, ME?

Lacking in human empathy?

Sensitivity of others opinions obliterated?

Untolerated questioning of them?

Diversity a convenient slogan?

But only when applied to self?

Is this our children?

The future?

It’s frightening to consider.

And the world is already a scary scary place.

“Expression of and respect for different opinions, and growing from the sharing is also extremely valuable. Even our own two eye don’t have the same view, and as a result have to work together to gain perspective.”

I read this quote a few minutes ago in the comment section of a blog post called “24 Things Women Over 30 Should Wear”…whatever the fuck they want seemed to the be gist of it lol! And I say Hurray for freedom of self expression and self governance!

But this quote embodies exactly what I was trying to convey today in a conversation I was having with daughter – a Millenial Child – and the divide that exists between Generation X and hers. I’d like to think that as a loving and close mother and daughter duo we can overcome our generational distinctions, and/or at least agree to keep open minds and hearts and never cross the line of indifference, intolerance… and never subjugate our personal truths.

Admittedly, it’s a challenge.

But hasn’t it always been?

Didn’t our parent’s bitch about us?

And their parents about them?

It’s kinda what we do…

But there is definitely a brooding dialogue afoot and everyone is getting in on it!

Thankfully, it’s not all on me and my kid!

Or is it?

  1.   A great beginning to what is turning into a long debate of US against THEM…sigh 😦

2) A Millenial Speaks Out About Her Own Generation: Attention Seeking or Truthsayer?

3) Ouch! (lol) Smart Asses!!! (Kinda my point!)

4) Humorous: Ya ya. I get it 😉

Yup. I could go on. But I’m sure you get the point.

It’s…a thing. A generational thing. And it won’t end here. Wait till Millennial children have children lol. Oh boy! And, before you Millennials start bitching about Gen X’s and how we’ve ruined, well, the world…remember that as much as you don’t want to be stereotyped, neither do we! There’s a valid argument for every side of this multifaceted, headless coin! So don’t bitch about us bitching about you..DO SOMETHING CONSTRUCTIVE and BE THE CHANGE YOU WISH TO SEE IN THE WORLD!

Ya…kinda stole that last bit from Gandhi. He just knew shit and said it right! 😉

Gemini Girls

She smiled as I walked in the room. That slow simmer in her eyes as she drank me in from head to toe told me I’d been missed. My breath caught. My face flushed. I felt the curl of anticipation tighten my loins. I needed this. I needed to feel the missing again. I’ve missed you too baby, I smiled back. And dropped my bag silently to floor…

Sigh. Imagination is a wonderful tool…

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the state of my missing-ness. You know, that wonderful place inside that leaps with happy at the thought of seeing someone again. Whether it’s been a day or a lifetime. And I realize that as a hard core Gemini, I need that in my orbit continuously. Anticipation. Longing. Good old fashioned “missing you”. The stuff that keeps my twins glued side by side. And in harmony.

Ya. It’s a problem.

If I had to compare my zodiac selves they’d be sisters of opposing natures. Twins. But not alike. At all. One hard and defensive; a warrior and survivor. The other soft and inviting; the wanton seductress. One desiring to be mother, housewife and nurturer. The other brazen, sexy, the whore in bed. One afraid of commitment. Of limitation. Needing to soar. Inspired by freedom. The other wanting safety. Security. A life partner. Grounding.

They war.



A tireless and exhausting struggle for supremacy. Emergence a battle with every breath. With every thought. With. Every. Fucking. Feeling.

And I have yet to find The One who genuinely gets that. And is truly okay with my Mercury Girls. They are manageable. But they each have specific needs for expression.

Double sigh.

My therapist had me do something akin to the Myers-Briggs test after our second session. Something to help her determine my personality type. My character traits. Things that are decisively me. The questions felt redundant after the 50th. But I persevered. Mindful of her not-so-hidden search for my suicidal tendencies. I had the strangest sense that I’d be committed if I answered those particular ones in the affirmative one too many times. So I didn’t. But the truth is, I do love life and have no real desire to end it. I just get overwhelmingly tired of it all at times…

The conclusive of this questionnaire is many-fold, but the bottom line is that I am a dichotomy. Her word. Not mine. Apparently, most of my character and personality traits are at odds with one another and shouldn’t coexist within one person.


Ya think?!!!

Refreshing to hear confirmation of my self-evident truths.

Marilyn, Angelina and Drew.

Beautifully fucked up women.

All Gemini Girls.

Our commonality?

The unabashed need for love.


And then I found this little ditty online…

Romance and Gemini women go hand in hand, but it is quite a task to get a Gemini woman to settle down for a commitment. Since stability and consistency are tangents to her personality traits, the idea of committing to a single person can be a daunting job for her.

Gemini women aren’t the criticizing types. As such, they find something good or positive in each person. And when looking for a potential partner, if you manage to stir a Gemini woman with your excellent conversational skills and strike a chord with her mental, spiritual and physical self, she’ll be yours forever.

Romancing a Gemini woman is like enjoying the company of many for she never is the same person twice. She may be exceedingly sweet one day, and the very next day might turn into your harshest critic and the following day compliment you for something she had just criticized the previous day. But once she meets up with her perfect partner, expressions of love take the primary seat.

She loves small sentimental gestures that keep the romance alive and the relationship kicking. In return, she’ll treat you beautifully by being your best friend, your sports partner, your racing competitor and your exciting, passionate lover, all at the same time.

The key to keeping your Gemini woman is by mentally exciting her and stimulating her senses by making her feel challenged and entertained. Just remember the phrase, catching is not the same as keeping when it comes to Gemini woman! So, if you have successfully managed to rope in a Gemini woman as your girlfriend, consider it a job only half done. If you can’t hold her interest for long, then, poof! she’ll be gone to seek greener pastures!


Lol…need I say more?

I think I’m finally getting to know my Gemini Girls. 😉