How To Be Happy Every Day: It Will Change The World!

I don’t always share posts from my other blog here unless I feel the message is super important and needs to get out to more people. And in this case I do! I have followers here who don’t follow me on The Buddha, and this particular post warrants repetition. 365 Give is a beautiful concept and I just have to share it wherever and whenever I can! So, here it is. And, lucky you lol, there’s an audio version if you just want to sit back and listen instead.

(Click here and I’ll croon in your ear for 11:39 minutes lol. Kinda fun. 🙂 )


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ometimes you come across a message that seems totally random, but when you really start thinking about it, it’s really not random at all.

This morning I woke up depressed. Feeling like there is no purpose to my life. I know. BIG right? It’s not a new feeling. I’ve just learned to push past it. Mostly. Some days are harder than others. Today is one of the hard ones. But I decided that no matter how shitty I felt, I had to at least Get Dressed and Show Up.

Truly, that’s half the battle.

So, I showered, made myself smell yummy (vanilla always makes me feel good) and threw on something other than the sweats I’ve lived in for the past three days. I grabbed my iPhone, ear buds, a stick of incense and three candles. I lit up, sat on the couch, assumed the position, plugged in and began my I-try-to-do-this-every-day meditation.

Meditation is friggin awesome! Always.

Which makes me wonder why the hell I don’t actually do it every single day.

When it was over, I scanned the app for another one. I needed more. I really wanted to lift the gloom that’s been pressing down on me. This feeling of Not Enoughness. Of worthlessness. Of nothingness. Of stagnancy. Of bleakness. This questioning of “For Fuck Sakes-What The Hell Is The Point!” shit that’s been circling my drain lately. But as I was scanning through the hundreds of options, looking for that magical meditation that would lift me back into a place of zen and positivity, I slowly closed my eyes and paused.

Just sat there. In silence. Doing nothing.

And then I felt this tidal wave of emotion building inside of me.

One by one the tears started to flow through closed lids. Warm and salty they traced my cheeks and flowed into the curve of my mouth.

I don’t usually cry randomly. And not with my eyes shut. But the tears just came unbidden.

And then I started to pray. I mean really pray.

It was a little awkward at first. I’m always unsure of whether or not to, and who I should be praying to. God? The Creator? The Divine? Spirit? Myself? And you all know that I am not a God Fearing Christian

But I prayed anyway. Silently at first. Then out loud.

Hearing my own softly pleading, desperately humble voice made me cry even harder. I sounded so…lost.

I acknowledged the gifts I have been given. Love. Friends. Family. Communication. Writing. Creativity. Love of Humanity. Compassion. Forgiveness. Healing. Even Pain. And I thanked Her/Him again for all the times they literally saved my life. And then I asked, “Why Am I Here?” Not in the huge philosophical way, but in the small little ME way. Why am I here? ME. What is MY purpose?

I do believe I have one. Most days. 😉

As I Age more. Learn more. Listen more. See more. Understand more. I grow more and more disheartened by the inhumane ways we humans treat each-other. I become frightened for the future generations that have to live in this crazy fucked up world. For my daughter and her unborn children and their unborn children.

But worst of all, being the eternal-optimistic-believer-in-the-good-of-mankind that I am…is beginning to hurt my soul. I am starting to lose faith that ONE person can actually make a positive difference. That ONE person can create a ripple of good powerful enough to affect real and lasting change. And I really really don’t like feeling this way.

It seems we have lost our World Heroes. The Buddha’s and the Gandhi’s and the Mother Theresa’s, and dare I say it, the Jesus’s of the world are gone. And while I sincerely hope there are others in the making even before I wrote this, it doesn’t look like anyone is stepping up to replace those beautiful, loving, spirits of generosity. Instead we are bombarded, beaten and bullied by powerful anti-human World Villains like the Trump’s and the KKK’s and the White Supremacists. Our hopes and our hearts and our very souls becoming stained by their violence on the natural diversity that is our humanity.

This is not a political tirade.

This is Despair speaking from a place of Honesty. For me and for the world. And it’s got me down. Big time.

So, I asked The-All-Powerful-Being-In-The-Sky to please show me my purpose here on earth because I feel like I have lost my way. I am deeply troubled by the very real issues that affect us all on a very profoundly personal level.  The loss of Hope is mounting on a scale that is almost unimaginable. And it’s evident in the anxiety, the depression, the stress and the suicides. Look around you the next time you are out in the world. Really look into the faces of the people.

SO FEW OF US ARE HAPPY.

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As for me. All I want to do is spread a little love and sunshine so that for someone, somewhere, life isn’t so friggin sad. Myself included. I actually said out loud and with genuine intention, “I surrender myself to YOU because I am doing such a shitty job at this whole Life thing.” And I meant it. Humble right? Lol. Well, all I can say is that if we are truly made in the image of The Creator, than sarcasm and dark humor are not man-made. 😉

I sat on the couch and stayed in that emotional, tear-filled space for about 15  minutes. And then I felt calmer. The tears subsided. I breathed in deeply and tried to ground myself. I didn’t know if my prayers were truly heard, or if I even prayed the right way, but I like to think Someone or Something heard my heart and, in the moment, that was enough.

When I reached for my iPhone again, I closed the meditation app and a few other windows I had left open. One of them was a Ted Talk I had been listening to yesterday, but now in its place was a different Ted Talk waiting to be heard. A woman named Jacqueline Way stood frozen on my screen with a caption above her head. Apparently, she had a plan on:

How To Be Happy Every Day: It Will Change The World.

I was like…seriously?

Then I was like…HOLY SHIT. Seriously!

(You gotta listen when the Universe is trying to tell you something. Isn’t this what I had just prayed about???!)

So I watched and listened.

And my faith was kinda restored a little bit.

ONE person CAN STILL make a difference in this fucked up world.

It was a sign. Yup. I’m going there lol. 

What Jacqueline Way has created is a beautiful life implementation called 365 Give. It’s brilliant! And I for one am going to actively take part, and spread this message anyway that I can! And if YOU are a parent with a growing young mind to shape, then you really need to watch this! It’s neuroscience at its most basic, and goodwill toward humanity at its best. She’s a friggin shiny ray of sunshine and Hope for a better world! Yay Jacqueline!!!

We all need to listen to this!

Don’t you dare leave this page without clicking on the video! 


AND THEN I FOUND THIS RIGHT AFTER I WATCHED THE VIDEO 

Reblogged: A Thomas Point of View: Ghost 🙂

I posted this poem yesterday. It was the catalyst for this post and the thing that lifted my mood immensely. So thank you, Tikeetha, once again. Much love! ❤


Writing this made me feel a little better. I hope it does the same for you. 

Sometimes you come across a message that seems totally random, but when you really start thinking about it, it’s really not random at all. No matter how shitty you might feel, Get Dressed and Show Up. 

Truly, that’s half the battle!


 

HAVE AN AWESOME WEEKEND!

See you soon. Till then…

OWN YOURSELF!

ACCEPT, EMBRACE & LOVE

EVERYTHING THAT MAKES YOU YOU!

And Namaste your ASS off!

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So, let’s talk about my new friend, Happy!

Happy and I met about a year ago in a blizzard of wintry white. Sitting on the couch watching quietly as the world disappeared under a blanket of snow, I was painfully lamenting, once again, my broken heart. I had fallen in love and ultimately been rejected. I am not one of those women who falls in and out of love on a dime, so that kind of intense, emotional bonding is super rare for me. And the struggle to just get over it was real. For a long time, I continued to suffocate in a deep pool of self-recrimination. Asking myself all the agonizing questions one asks when a relationship ends. Why did they leave me? Why hadn’t I been enough? What could I have done differently? And so on. It’s a thing we do, right? Rejection is never easy. But, here’s the clincher.

The relationship had ended nearly two years prior.

And I was deeply involved in a new one.

I know, right. Ya. I took it pretty hard and my recovery-from-rejection skills were at an all time low. I met my nemesis, Abandonment when I was little, and we have never seen eye to eye. And somehow, in this life, I don’t think we ever will.

Now, on this particular super stormy winter day, I was wallowing in anger, futility, and hopelessness and feeling stupid sorry for myself, when a new voice joined the cacophony in my head and shouted, “Seriously, Trish? Again? What is wrong with you?” And I swear, it was literally in that moment, that something inside me just kinda clicked. I looked around at my surroundings and seemed to see my life, as it was, clearly for the first time. The warm and wonderful home I had created with my new partner. The abundance of true acceptance and positivity I had in my life. And most importantly, in a flash of brutal insight, I realized what a disservice I was doing to the person who was actually giving me the kind of love that I needed. I had it all yet, I couldn’t see any of it because I was stuck in a never-ending loop of negativity that came from reliving the past. Over and over and over.

 And because I refused to change my thinking

 I stayed there for a very, very long and painful time.

But in that wonderful moment of realization, I felt this bubble rise up and burst in my gut, in a warm and fuzzy kinda way, and all my crazy angst settled into acceptance. And the more I looked around, the more present I became. I almost felt embarrassed by how foolish I had been, wasting so much time hurting myself over the past. It was done. It was over. And no amount of agonizing was going to change that. So, I respectfully and consciously made the decision to let it go. And guess who showed up and introduced herself?

 HAPPY!

And I was like, damn girl! You are lookin’ gooood!

Lol, okay. To be honest, I wasn’t sure I trusted Happy at first. She was covered in a sticky sweet, sugar-coated gooeyness that I was completely unfamiliar with. And my non-trusting and way too familiar friend, Doubt, was only too eager to tell me to step away! That Happy couldn’t be trusted. That staying in our comfortably familiar place of brooding and sadness and misery was infinitely more pleasing. But, the choice to stay stuck exactly where I was suddenly no longer seemed acceptable. And it sure as hell wasn’t fun!

I wanted more for myself.

And I deserved more!

Even in my most insecure and darkest moments, I always knew I was capable of so much more then I was allowing myself to be. So, I dug deep into my arsenal of awesome life experiences and grabbed onto something that would allow me to befriend this foreign, but magnificent creature. And the first thing I found was Choice. Choice was the tool I used to move into a space that I intuitively knew would make me feel Happy and believe she was real. I had to trust my gut. And that wasn’t easy. Did I mention Doubt and I were pretty tight at this point? Still, I made the choice to push away the things that didn’t make me feel good and only accept the things that did. I didn’t reprimand myself for putting myself first, something I have always had trouble doing, and I gave myself permission to be free of the past. Self-compassion eventually won out and led me to the path of learning to love ME.

I embraced Happy as a fulltime roommate and you know what?

She’s friggen awesome!!!

Happy and I are still getting to know one another, so we do this little dance every now and then. The two-step. One step forward and two steps back lol. But I am confident we will find a rhythm that works beautifully for both of us. I’m no Happiness Guru (not yet anyhow ) and I don’t have all the answers. And I’m in no way trying to convince you otherwise. I make mistakes, have shitastic days and get weighed down in fear and self-doubt, just like everybody else. Besides, this is a BIG BIG topic and there is no way the question of how to be happy could ever be covered in one simple newsletter. People have spent lifetimes trying to figure this shit out, and those people have more people trying to figure their shit out!

Because Happy Looks Different To Everybody!

For me, it began with the simple and conscious decision to let Happy into my life. To understand that cultivating a genuine willingness to open myself up to changing my attitude, my behaviors and ultimately my thoughts, were the only way Happy was gonna come. And I really wanted Happy to come. I’m talking about true happy; lasting happy. Happy that comes from within. Not the crack-happy that has you soaring one day and then bottoming out the next. Nope. I wanted the real McCoy.

So I did the work!

And I did it with these three things.

Intention. Focus. Repetition.

I learned to stop the negative self-talk and started a brand new conversation in my mind with positive self-talk. I learned what to say to myself when I talked to myself so that I wouldn’t fall back into the same mental and emotional trap. I had to remind myself what an amazing person I am. How kind and loving and compassionate I am. How intelligent and creative and fun I am. How sincere and honest and powerful I am. And I had to remind myself that I am worthy and deserving of loving and healthy relationships in every area of my life. In truth, I kinda had to rewire my brain cuz that negative loop had been playing for a very, very long time.

Was it easy to move from pain and apathy to acceptance and happy? Hell no! It took a lot of work! I had to learn to shut out the noise of negative self-talk, practice a crap load of mindfulness, and had to keep kicking myself to stay present. And I had days where I just wanted to quit trying and just slip back into the rabbit hole. And some days I did. But, I never stayed there long. And soon the times in between crazy angst and calm became further and further apart. I connected with my gut again. And started trusting what it was telling me. I started finding meaning and purpose in my life again, something I had lost somewhere along the way.

But most importantly, I found my long lost best friend,

Confidence!

We are like crazy tight now and she is sexy as hell, let me tell ya!

So, I’m gonna share a little pearl of wisdom and tell you this: Much of our success and fulfillment, which is what Happy really is, comes down to how we see things. It comes down to the meaning we choose to give the events and circumstances we find ourselves in. It comes down to what we believe this wonderful thing called life is all about.

There is so much noise in our world these days. So much that disconnects us from who we are and from achieving what we want most. We’ve disconnected from our gut and the truth we know is buried deep inside. We don’t take the time to sit and listen to ourselves anymore. Our most positive selves. Our most cherished selves. The one who knows we are friggen rock stars! We need to shut out the hundreds of thousands of negative messages that we are bombarded with every day, including the ones we tell ourselves! The ones that tell us we need to do this to be successful, or put up with that to be loved, or be this to be accepted, or look like this to be beautiful. And definitely, the ones that tell us we aren’t good enough! Screw that!!!

We need to take more time just to enjoy being US! 

When did that happen anyway? When did we become so obsessed with doing so much stuff that we forgot how to just BE?

Your attitude impacts everything. It directs your thoughts, your energy and most of all, the actions you take. If you want to master one of the most underrated secrets for how to be successful and happy in life, this is it:

Positivity!

Yup! Positive Attitude! Positive Self-Talk!

Now, before you roll your eyes and say here she goes with the hippy dippy stuff again, listen up! When I say positivity, I’m not talking about wearing rose-colored glasses or ignoring real-life challenges. And I’m not talking about being fake or keeping your not-so-positive emotions hidden. We’ve all got them. But, it’s about how you manage them, and how much control you give them that matters! What I’m asking you to do is use more of your Intelligence. Be smarter! Become aware of how much power you have and take responsibility for the impact your Attitude has on the quality of your life!

The actions you take, the energy you exude and the results you create are so much better when you practice positivity. Positive Self-Talk might seem obvious to you, but you’d be surprised to learn that most people just react to the world and allow their attitude to be dictated by the events that happen around them. Even if you have the best of intentions, do all the right things, and work really, really hard, if you don’t learn to harness this amazing and positive energetic exchange, you’re never gonna meet Happy!

And did I mention that Happy is pretty friggen phenomenal!

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It takes the brain a while to acquire new information and incorporate it, so don’t beat yourself up if you try to run with this and fall down a few times. BE PATIENT with yourself. Embrace your ambition and don’t be afraid of the gap between where you are now and where you want to be. Just keep trying! We really need to learn that the real stuff doesn’t happen overnight! We need to give ourselves time to learn, to implement, to fail and to ultimately succeed! It’s a process. This is so important to understand! Listen to your gut. It’s trying to tell you something and it’s the place where your truest happy resides.

How many of you have had a strong gut feeling, ignored it

and then were sorry you did afterward?

Ya, I thought so.

Gut level cognition is absolutely valid and we ignore it all too often!

 YOU deserve to be Happy! 

So listen to your GUT! Stay Positive! Practice Positive Self-Talk! 

This trifecta will never steer you wrong!

Whew! That’s it my lovelies! Lol, like I said, HAPPY is a BIG subject! I may not have all the answers but my promise and commitment is to bring you the very best of what I’m living and learning and keep it as real and as honest as I can. Don’t expect perfection cuz it ain’t gonna happen lol. But you can expect thought-provoking ideas, my own timeless brand of wisdom, some silliness in between, and an unwavering devotion to helping you live your most expansive, expressive and meaningful life… Happily!

Till then,

Own Yourself!

Accept, Embrace & Love

Everything that makes you YOU!

And Namaste Your Ass Off!


I wish I could show you, when you are lonely or in darkness, the astonishing light of your own being.~ Hafiz (1320-1389)