Goodbyes…

It took a minute.

Well. More than a minute.

More like 5 years and then some.

And when I say it like that it almost seems ridiculous, doesn’t it?

And I almost feel a little foolish that it’s taken me so long.

But the heart is a thing not always controlled.

I finally understand

You can never go back.

And in truth, I didn’t want to.

I only ever wanted to move forward.

But I do miss the sweetness of times

That were filled with the freshness of new.

Once upon a time is a real thing

But happily ever after is somewhat questionable.

The future can’t exist without the past.

And without the past there is no future.

Kind of an oxymoron.

And sometimes the same ol’ same ol’ can look brand new.

You just have to chose where you want to live.

It’s all about perspective I suppose.

But I’ve done what I needed to do.

And I did it scared.

I have regrets. Deep regrets. And I have sorrow.

My view will never be quite the same.

And neither will my heart.

I suppose experience is the wisest teacher

Even if it is relentless in it’s pursuit of knowledge.

But I survived and live to love another day.

I’m sure one day I will be grateful for the lessons

In life and love and coming out.

Just not today…

As I sit beside the shoreline to breathe in this day

Filled with angst and fear and wild imaginings

The release is bittersweet.

But I am free.

So I too will take one long last look at the sunset

And soak in the embers of the afterglow.

And remind myself

Never to forget the reckoning

The courage it took

The pride I feel

Or the truth

That lives in the feeling

Of this exact moment.

And then I will get up

And walk away

Because I was never meant to stay here

In the embers of the afterglow

Now that the sun has finally set.

………………………………………………………………………………

Thank you Alexis…for the timely inspiration. ❤

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6 thoughts on “Goodbyes…

  1. Hey there. This was a really nice piece T. Sounds like you’ve been doing through a lot of purging lately? You’re right that the heart is not easy to control but it looks like you’ve managed to reign it in and harness that power. Love is hard sometimes but it’s so worth it when you get it right. I wish that for you my friend. Happy Mother’s Day! Hugs from across the pond! 💐❤

    1. I have been doing some serious searching for answers that’s for sure! I’m finding them and they aren’t all what I had hoped they’d be or what I necessarily wanted, but sometimes you have to roll with the punches, then get back up to fight another day. I will always believe in love Denny. I’m kind of wired like that lol but thank you. And thanks for the Mothers Day wish as well and backatcha if you are a mama too! 💐❤

    1. Head high and a smile on my face. 😁 Life is too short to be sad over things you can’t change. I do “got” this lol! Thanks Sandy.

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