I read this today. It’s from the author of the Vagina Monologues, Eve Ensler. She’s written a new book called “I Am An Emotional Creature” and in it she writes to teens speaking of their angst and emotion, relating to the reality that is their life. A place we all lived once, but seem to have forgotten as we grow up. It resonated somewhere deep inside of me. I’m not sure if it spoke to my lost teenaged self or if it speaks to my new found lesbian self…or if it’s simply how I think you perceive me at times in the role I am becoming accustomed to but even so, I’m not following any of the traditional rules. I don’t act like a lesbian, I don’t talk like a lesbian, I haven’t been in the lesbian community all my life… and I came out late. All no no’s according to true ‘gay’ tradition. Maybe even all no no’s to you?
Either way it struck a chord and I wanted to write it here for posterity.
I think you will understand why…
“I Am An Emotional Creature”
I know we make you feel stupid, as if being a teenager meant you were temporarily deranged. We have become accustomed to muting you, judging you, discounting you, asking you – sometimes even forcing you – to betray what you see and how you feel.
You scare us. You remind us of what we have been forced to shut down or abandon in ourselves in order to fit in. You ask us by your being to question, to wake up, to re-perceive. Sometimes I think we tell you we are protecting you when really we are protecting ourselves from our own feelings of self-betrayal and loss.
So many times you tell me that you are unhappy with the life you have lived. That you are dissatisfied with yourself and decisions you have made. And I know it makes you insane that I don’t walk and talk and breathe like a lesbian. I’m sorry that you have so much frustration to deal with, and I’m sorry that you can’t see how full your life has truly been, despite all you have endured. You’re an amazing woman, rich with stories, experience and an uncanny insight into the human condition. You have love and laughter and joy in your life and that’s more then a lot of people out here ever have.
From one emotional creature to another
Be grateful for who you are
And be grateful for who I am too