Just Me

I will never be a lesbian

I am never going to be enough
Never going to do the things
She’s used to
Never going to say the things
She’s used to
She has a past
With lovers and experiences
I can’t compete with
So do I
But the difference is
I wanted something new
While she wants the same thing she had
Before
And my heart breaks
Every time I hear her say
She is still waiting
For me to be
A lesbian

I am just me
Trish
The woman, the healer
The dreamer who loves
Who understands
Who is patient
Who wants and desires
The lover who fantasizes
And anticipates her touch

I love her
But it will never be enough
I am starting to truly see that now
And it hurts

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