Broken Woman

Broken Woman

Found this recently and loved it. Both for its artistic expression and its appropriateness. If she were brown-skinned and howling at the moon, she would be I. Didn’t name the photo, but knew a soul felt relate-ability. Props to the artist and thanks…she’s my wallpaper and will be for awhile. A reminder that I am fluid and strong, even when feeling weak.


Once More…

If you could see me now
Living in the hollowed out existence
Of my yesterdays with you
Clinging to the truest
Most complete sense
Of belonging to anyone
I have ever experienced
Aching to breathe in my air
And soak in my skin
The living scent of you
With all its beautiful layers
Of exquisite arousal
And peaceful contentment
Distinctly you
And only you
If you could live inside my life
For just a fraction
You would leave it
Never again in doubt
For you would know
That I would give anything
To be in that place
That heavenly place
Sharing in a love so…
Venezuela
Distinctly mine
Forever yours
Perfectly ours
Where we would fit intrinsically
Limbs entwined
Lips a breath away
Anticipating
Once more

I miss our love


Smiling Faces

So much has happened in the last 7 months that to try and fit it all in one post would discredit the whirling emotions and complicated people and extraordinary circumstances behind the monumentous and life changing events, so I won’t bother to try. Besides, I’ve moved yet again and am awaiting my Internet hookup. As smart as my phone is, I dislike blogging in this medium. It lacks the depth and breadth of my desktop screen and is missing the persona attached to my 1940’s writing desk. Short of hand written notes, I need correct environment for verbosity and my Samsung 4S Mini, as sexy and sleek as it is, is not my muse. I will say however, that life is not all I had hoped for in this 53rd year of my birth which was celebrated quietly on the 24 of May, with beloved daughter, best friend eX and new boi in my life… and tho the tapas was delicious and the gifts heartfelt, the day was flat and empty. And sad.

Someone was missing.

All is not well in my world for I’m learning once again that smiling faces can hide dark demons and that misery can quickly replace rapture. It’s a false world full of false people and in this moment I am appreciating the deep and sometimes brutal honesty of the damaged and broken. At least their truth is pure and the smile lighting their eyes is a peaceful and almost ethereal glow and not a reflection of the scorching hellfire brimming just below the surface.

Beware the smiling face spouting pretty platitudes for to swoon in the sweet serenade of the silver tongued mistress is to drown in the depth of convincing falsehoods that will corrupt your shining innocence…

If you let it.


Sleep

I am deceptively, alarmingly, perceptibly, hopelessly and angrily

Soooo

Tired…

Goodnight cruel world…Anon

I loved you so

And all of your possibility

Perhaps, in another

I will find the blossoms that bloomed

Beautifully and in glorious splendor

Just for me


Price Tag

No matter how much they promise

That you can enjoy the freedom of simply

Being

You

That they have no demand

Other then that

It’s a lie…

Everyone

No matter how well intended

Has a price tag

On your freedom of your soul

So the question is

Are you for sale?

 


If…

The indecision is striking at the heart of my understanding

I thought I knew

I really thought I knew and understood

The consequence

But all I want now

Is to use my heart designer key

And crawl into the space between your breasts

And know that I am home

And loved

And no longer wondering

What if…

If only it were that simple

If only you had known and understood then

What you understand now

If only we had loved

Under different circumstance and

If only the consequence of that love

Was not so full of

If…


Mistakes

I made one…

I didn’t listen to my heart

And now I will live in regret

But how do you know, when you choose a path

That’s it’s not the right one, until it’s too late?

Sigh…

I’m so fucking tired of the bullshit

So, today I turn the page

Fresh and clean

Blank and unrecorded by time

And write my story alone

I’d take back my virginity if I could

And claim the biggest do-over of a lifetime

Hello Universe…I’m just looking for me

How hard can that really be?

And perhaps

I shall even being to write anew…


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